Thursday, April 19, 2012

Walls

Walls. Not physical walls but rather I am thinking more about the imaginary ones that are in our lives.
Some people put up walls to protect themselves. This happens after we have been hurt by someone that we let ourselves love. We hope that by putting up a wall around our heart we protect our feelings, we will not let anyone hurt us again. We no longer trust. But who are we really not trusting? If you don't give someone a chance then you can't decide if they are worthy of your trust. Maybe the person you truly are not trusting is yourself. You don't trust your instincts to choose the right person to open your feelings to. You don't trust yourself to go through the pain of losing someone if they go away. To break down the wall you need to trust yourself first. If you don't allow yourself to feel for others you lose out on a wonderful part of life. You must feel pain to really know what pleasure feels like. You are here for one lifetime, why waste it feeling nothing?
If you build a wall to keep friends out then you feel alone when you need support. You need friends. You also need family. People put up a wall to keep family out too. This seems to be okay because family is replaced by friends that we consider family. Maybe these friends treat us the way we wish our family did. Perhaps these friends have similar moral values, therefor we want them as our family. Truth is they are still not your actual family. The wall you use to keep family out may be necessary because your family is truly abusive or dangerous. If it is simply that you don't agree with their choices in life then you may end up with deep regrets when they are gone forever and it it too late to love them for who they are, even with their faults.
If you have walls then as you grow and mature there comes a time to ask yourself what purpose these walls are serving.

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